https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tR8iIhjA2ys

Steele Shapiro (10th)- Veganism

Steele Shapiro, caught mid-walk, has stated, “vegans are cultists.” From the outside, veganism may seem miserable – no dairy or meat and a constant grumble in the tummy – yet, every vegan I have met emphatically boasts about the plus sides of veganism. Could Steele be onto something with this rapid fire hot take? There must be something we cannot see from the outside, maybe even, dare I say, a secret society…

Ella Widmyer (11th)- Peanut butter is nasty

Ella Widmyer, spotted on the third floor has strongly said, “Peanut butter is nasty,” and “everyone who likes it is weird.” To go as far as to say that it’s nasty, and peanut butter lovers are weird, well that’s just offensive. Clearly she has never had a peanut butter and (strawberry!) jelly sandwich, the yummiest, most mouthwatering food to be invented; my heart goes out to her.

Sophia Mills (10th)- School starts too early

Sophia Mills, sophomore, gives a scalding hot take as she makes a fashionably late entrance to school mid-second period, stating that Lincoln’s current 8:50 am start time is simply absurd. Judging by her 10:08 am arrival, we can tell that Sophia is firm in her stance, but what do you think? Personally, I think we could all use a couple hours of extra sleep before braving the exhausting day ahead.

Flora Bertrand (9th) & Sofia Leache (9th)- Timothee Chalamet is not that attractive

You heard it here first, Hollywood’s golden boy is not all that! Or at least not according to Flora Bertrand and Sofia Leache, two freshmen here at Lincoln High School. While his millions of Instagram followers and numerous starring roles in movies may speak otherwise, Sofia and Flora remain adamant in their opinions, claiming he’s “just not that cute.”

Graham Todd (9th)- Kris is the hottest Kardashian

According to the 9th grader Graham Todd, Kris Jenner is the hottest member of the Kardashian family. Kris was born in 1955 and has been giving looks ever since. However, on the website “Top Men Magazine”, Kris is ranked as 9th hottest Kardashian. Personally, I think Graham Todd has no chance with this hot babe.

Mak Knoerlin (10th)- Documentaries are boring

The sophomore Mak Knoerlin claims that documentaries are boring. Documentaries are films that tell important, unknown stories to inform their audience. I don’t know what kind of documentaries Mak is watching, but they definitely aren’t the right ones.

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